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How to Protect of Kids from Predators

9/28/2018

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     Cosby, Kavanaugh, and Catholic clergy grab the headlines -  some convicted, some accused - and I wonder how, in this sex-soaked culture, we can protect our most vulnerable - the kids. The statistics turn my stomach: one in four girls in America is sexually abused before the age of eighteen; among guys it’s one in six. At a seminar on child abuse I attended as a volunteer for an organization, I watched a video interview with a teen perpetrator who spoke blandly of fondling more than 500 children. I could have thrown up.    
     Who are these abusers? Ninety percent are known to the victims and their families. Only 10 percent are strangers. That means people we know and trust the most - relatives, friends, teachers, coaches - are those to watch most closely that they don’t cross boundaries “accidentally” or surreptitiously.
    
     But parents aren’t helpless to protect their children, says Margaret M. Ochoa from the Colorado School Safety Resource Center. At the seminar I attended, she said a valuable weapon parents hold is to teach kids correct anatomical terms for their private parts. Instruct them that it’s not okay for people to touch private parts or to display them, she said.
    
     Armed with this understanding, a child signals to a sex offender that he or she has a close relationship with parents and won’t be groomed easily into a relationship. The predator will realize the child could testify against him using anatomical terms, instead of slang that could be confusing as court testimony, says Ochoa, who is an attorney.
    
     What are private parts? “Tell them that anything under your swim suit is private parts,” she says.
    
     For those of us who grew up not using anatomically-correct words, this may make our faces burn, but if it keeps our kids safer, it’s worth it.
   
     Further information about sexual safety training is available here.

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