Category: Wholeness

Learning to Put Down the Ducky

11/14/2019

0 Comments

My grandson Joel showed me his collection of rubber duckies, and I confess: as an adult I once bought a rubber ducky when life was overwhelming and I needed a squeaky little friend for security.
     Which is why I smiled when I heard that “Sesame Street” is celebrating its fiftieth birthday. This PBS gem gave my girls and me songs for all occasions when they were little. Like singing “C Is for Cookie” while pulling steaming morsels out of the oven. Or belting out Oscar the Grouch’s “I Love Trash” as we collected ours.
     Recently I’ve been thinking about Ernie, who realized he had to “Put Down the Ducky” in order to learn to play the saxophone. I wonder if I have any duckies I’m clinging to that keep me from taking on new opportunities. Am I holding onto old securities? Or activities I might need to drop to make room for fresh possibilities?
     Clinical psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud calls this making “necessary endings.” When I’m willing to put down those duckies, I’m free to move into sunny days sweeping the clouds away - that's how we get to “Sesame Street.”
How about you? Holding onto any rubber duckies?

0 Comments

Chalking Up My Circles of Life

9/26/2019

0 Comments

I know there is a God and I’m not Him, so why do I fret so much? Does my huffing and puffing solve the world’s problems and save the environment and keep the grass from dying from my neighbor’s dog pooping on it? I don’t think so.
     So, with the “help” of my grandson Oak, I’m corralling my ever-expanding concerns through Stephen Covey’s book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.”
     Covey says we each live in a large Circle of Concerns, things we care about or that affect us even though we have little or no control over them. Instead of being distracted by them, he encourages us to focus our energy in a smaller sphere within that, our Circle of Influence, where we can, perhaps, make a difference.
     Good advice, but I’ve discovered two other spheres within my area of influence that I must ask hard questions about or I get into trouble:
     * My Circle of Responsibility - am I fulfilling what I’m actually responsible for?
     * My Circle of Capacity - am I exceeding the limits of my emotional and physical strength?
     If I ignore these questions, I develop another set of circles - under my eyes - from my distracted striving. I tackle what’s not my own, and forget to show up for my own life.
  And that is a colossal waste.

0 Comments

I did it again - I allowed myself to get swept away in busyness. Why do I do that?
     I don’t have the excuse of obligations of someone like Eugene H. Peterson, a world-renowned author and lecturer. Yet even with his full schedule, Peterson admitted he sometimes got caught up in busyness simply “because I am vain. I want to appear important. Significant.”
     Ouch. Do I bloat my schedule to try to look important?
     Vanity isn’t the only thing that tricked Peterson into busyness. He said that sometimes it was laziness. “I indolently let others decide what I will do instead of resolutely deciding myself.”
     I’ve done that, too, trying to please others by doing what THEY think I should do instead of setting boundaries.
     So instead of getting swept up with busyness, I want to make some sweeping reforms in my thinking and my schedule. Otherwise, my life may be as futile as Shakespeare described: “full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”
     What a tragedy that would be.

0 Comments

When Your Yellow Brick Road Trips You

7/26/2019

0 Comments

That’s me as Dorothy and my husband Duane as the Tin Man as we’re off to see the wonderful Wizard of Oz. Along with the Scarecrow and the Cowardly Lion, we’re seeking brains, a heart, courage, and a way home.
     Which is what we all need along life’s highway, isn’t it? Because every day we run into flying monkeys that vex our minds. Wicked witches that crush our emotions. Dark paths that leave us fearful to take another step. Our Yellow Brick Road trips us up.
     But can a Wizard of Oz save us?
     No.
     The “Wizards” - the shortcuts in life - are as powerless as the man behind the curtain who pushes levers that release worthless smoke.
  So how do we gain the knowledge, compassion, and bravery we need to make it through our days?
     The same way the characters in “The Wizard of Oz” did - by facing our adversities, not running from them. Then wisdom, empathy, and grit develop inside us. Then we find our place in this world.
     And that’s enough to keep us skippin’ down life’s road.

0 Comments

At an aquarium, I met an axolotl, a salamander that is doomed to remain in the water because it doesn’t matur fully, and I wondered whether I’m sometimes an axolotl.
During metamorphosis, this strange creature loses its tail fin and develops legs, but continues breathing through gills. It’s stuck in the water while other salamanders climb onto land and breath fresh air.
     I get stuck in the waters of immaturity sometimes, too. Like when I don’t accept responsibility for my words - whether they build up or tear down. Or my actions - whether they hurt or heal. Or my time - whether I give it freely or hoard it. Or my finances - whether I invest wisely or consume it all. Or my relationships - whether I encourage or discourage.
     None of us remains fully adult. We dip in and out of immaturity, perhaps because our self awareness is as blurry as murky water. As Fifteenth Century writer Thomas à Kempis says, “We rebuke small faults in others but overlook greater faults in ourselves.”
     What a breath of fresh air when I choose to be grown up.
     But it is a choice that requires amazing grace.
     *** Photo: Stan Shebs, Steinhart Aquarium, San Francisco.

Congratulations to Doug Reents, who bid the highest for lunch with me, and whose bid goes to JeffCo Eats, which provides food for kids who sometimes find their pantry bare. Between Doug's bid and others who donated outright to jeffcoeats.org, we raised more than $200. I just popped into the mail a Panera gift card for Doug because we don't live in the same community. Enjoy!

0 Comments

<<Previous

Learning to Put Down the Ducky

Chalking Up My Circles of Life

Getting Swept Away?

When Your Yellow Brick Road Trips You

Am I an Axolotl?

Categories

Archives